Posts Tagged ‘divorced dads’
Divorce isn’t an easy thing to go through. It’s hard on you, your ex spouse, and especially your child or children. As much as you’d like to just leave this experience behind you, that’s not going to happen because you have a child or children with your ex. I’ll do my best to give you some tips on how in spite of you being one of the divorced dads, you can manage this challenge quite well.
Spend As Much Time With Your Kid(s) As You Are Able
This will do you and your children a lot of good. If they’re little, take them to the playground, take them sleigh riding, take them to the park or out for ice cream. If they’re teenagers and not into spending time with their parents, just give them a call and make a date to meet them for lunch sometime at a place of their choice.
Don’t Inquire To Your Child About What Mom Is Up To
A lot of divorced dads do this and it’s not healthy at all. I know you’re just dying to know if she’s seeing someone else and such but keep the kids out of it. Doing this puts the kids in a very uncomfortable position. They’ll want to please you and tell you things but at the same time, they won’t want to rat on mom.
Do Your Very Best To Have a Civil Relationship With Your Ex
I know it may not be easy but do your best. It’s best to early on, have a sit down talk with your ex on being civil to one another for the sake of the children. If one thing positive came from your divorce, it’s that the children don’t hear mom and dad fighting in the house anymore. Don’t put them through more of it now that you’re gone from the home. If a conflict comes into play, you and your ex need to meet at a location different from the home and property that your children are present. I understand that you and your ex may have a lot of anger toward one another but fighting in the presence of the children is damaging to the children and yours and your exes relationship with them.
Don’t Talk Bad About Your Ex Around Your Children
Your ex is your child’s mother. I want you to think about your relationship with your mom when you were a child. You likely thought the world of your mom. Your child is no different. Talking bad about their mom (your ex) will hurt and anger your child. You may have a lot of anger toward your ex and it may be very justified but refrain from the trash talk about your ex around your children. No good can come from that.
If you’re one of the divorced dads in your town or city, do your best to shine above all the other divorced dads in the neighborhood. This will do you, your ex, and especially your children a world of good. Good luck to you.
Divorced Dads – While divorce is stressful for you and your partner, it can often be even more difficult for your children. They may not understand what happened and may even be carrying guilt or anxiety, thinking that they may have had something to do with it. It’s important to let your kids know that you love them very much and always will, and that they had nothing to do with the divorce.
Parenting following a divorce may feel like a whole new game, especially newly divorced dads. The rules are different now. You may not see your kids as often as you’d like, and when you do, there might be a lot of tension. Learning to “play nicely” with your ex can go a long way and help smooth things along as you all navigate through this new situation.
Dealing with an Ex
The person who previously shared your life may feel very much like a stranger now. This is normal, but when kids are involved, it’s important that you at least make an effort to communicate and be civil to each other. Follow these guidelines when dealing with your ex to help smooth over your interactions:
- Create boundaries and follow them. Your attorney can help you set these.
- Don’t bash your ex, either to your friends or online, especially when your kids can hear.
- Resist the temptation to behave passive-aggressively.
- Even if your ex behaves badly, don’t sink to their level.
- Treat an ex like you would a co-worker. You don’t have to like them, but you do have to work together. Read the rest of this entry »