Author Topic: need some advice  (Read 1975 times)

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need some advice
« on: February 07, 2009, 11:52:51 PM »
i have had a really hard time lately with my family shelly says that i have been like a butthole to the kids but man i really feel like running far far away and just hiding for awhile so i can have some damn peace. i have been trying my best to transition with every mood swing and i cant take it everytime i ask them to do something they give me attitude and smack my legs or my ass when i walk by. i tried talking to shelly and she says i am the cause for it. i really dont believe that because i am doing everything i can for every one here. i dont get any respect and because of it i feel like really getting a hold of them and spankin some respect into them and then on the other hand i know that spanking them isnt going to work for respect. i am going to have to get shelly to make them treat me right or i know for sure if i have to put up with these girls doing this to me for years and years to come i will take it for as long as i psychologically can and then i just dont know. Dad's i need some advice?

Offline dscottnmel

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Re: need some advice
« Reply #1 on: February 08, 2009, 08:06:42 AM »
Being a step-father is one tough job. My stepdaughter lives with her father now, by her decision. Not because of our relationship, because she was raised by my wife for a long time and she wanted to test the waters on the other side. Anyhow, we get along now alot better than when she was going through that "your not my real father" stage. We had a great relationship when she was younger, then she went through pre-teen things and it went downhill. Now it's so much better and I don't believe it's because she no longer lives with us, it's because she grew up and realizes things are the same everywhere you go. I'm not sure really what to tell you, other than stick it out, it will get better. You're right, being angry with them only causes more resentment. Good luck.

Offline BobChase

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Re: need some advice
« Reply #2 on: February 08, 2009, 08:34:51 AM »
Are you and your wife sending the same message? We've found that consistency is key. You and your wife have to be a united front.

With the hitting we've always tried to put a stop to it as soon as it started. If it continues we'll take away tv time or a toy until she understands she was wrong. It seems to have worked well. You just have to be firm and don't waver. I won't spank them for hitting though. I think it reinforces the bad behavior.

I'm not sure what to do about the attitude though (I sure could use some help here myself :sigh:).


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