Author Topic: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!  (Read 3520 times)

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NJdad

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HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« on: June 18, 2012, 07:37:53 AM »
So hi!  I stay at home with my 2 wonderful children Daniel is 3 1/2 and Adriana is 10 mos.  my wife gives me a lot of crap for not getting house chores done bc I'm spending my time with them and not doing all chores (dishes, laundry, put clothes away, etc). I feel I can't find time to do but that's not what she wants to hear!  I do understand since she works hard and a lot.  I just am not very good at scheduling my time and keeping to it. Ok I don't have a schedule!  Please help!  I'm up usually t 5am and kids get up around 6-7am.  Wife gets home by 3pm and wants all done by then bc if not shell just do everything herself and she'll be mad! Don't know what to do.  Any advice?? Thanks guys!


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NJdad

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HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #1 on: June 18, 2012, 08:01:08 AM »
Also my son won't eat.  He drinks a sippie cup still and we're not sure how to take away from him.  I think that's why he won't eat much.  It's very frustrating.  He's so picky! Always says he wants chops and ice pops and we rarely offer that stuff to him!? Oh boy! Thanks for any ideas!

Offline itsallbs

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Re: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #2 on: June 20, 2012, 11:53:30 AM »
Hi Dave,

Welcome.

You are definitely not alone on the chore aspect.  I'd suggest that you get Daniel involved in clean up time if possible and since you're an early riser perhaps you can tackle some tasks then that otherwise would be difficult with the two awake and during their nap times.  At the same time your wife is most likely exhausted from work, but she could probably pitch in too.  For example, light clean up before going to bed; 10 minutes of clean up makes a huge difference.

My son is roughly the same age as Daniel and he can be quite picky too.  My suggestion would be to have the food out for him as he goes about his daily routine.  Does he have a particular favorite food?  Fingers food probably work best such as chicken nuggets, baby carrots, whatever you have handy.  If I've learned anything it's that you have to make whatever he eats count nutrition-wise.  Liquids definitely can fill them up and you don't necessarily have to take away the sippy cup again by having the food set on a table for him to grab.

As far as a particular schedule, do what works for you.  It doesn't have to be rigid but maybe a window of time to do whatever task you need to complete.  In addition, make gradual changes, when you dive in for a sudden change you may keep it up for a bit then suddenly go back to your old ways.

Keep up the good work! I'm sure you have your hands full!

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Re: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #3 on: June 20, 2012, 04:31:21 PM »
Hey Dave.   Great to have you here.


I agree with itsallbs.  Usually, what I do is start with the kitchen and living room.  That's two of the busiest rooms in the house.   I empty the dishwasher first and then fill it with whatever dishes are in the sink.  Then while it is running I quick cleanup the kitchen.   If you could do a super cleaning one time a week then you could spot clean the rest of the week.  It works really good for me and I have 3 kids.  Of course the kids take care of their rooms and their bathroom.   But I will go in there and spot check them after they are done.


Now laundry is a different matter.  It seems to be going on at all times.  Laundry though can be done anytime and doesn't matter if the kids are asleep or not because it's a quite type of cleaning.


I hope all of this helped.  Keep us updated.

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Offline z_randy

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Re: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #4 on: June 21, 2012, 09:58:49 PM »
Hi Dave,
Welcome!  Where in NJ are you from?  I'm in Hunterdon county.
I'm not a SAHD so it's hard for me to say but I do understand wanting to spend all the time with the kids.  But you need to make time to get stuff done that you need to get done.  Tough with kids that age



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fatt_tony_13

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Re: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #5 on: June 26, 2012, 03:02:21 AM »
I usually try to get chores done during naptime.

NJdad

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HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #6 on: June 26, 2012, 10:07:53 AM »
Thanks everyone!  Gonna work on it.

Offline Keith

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Re: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #7 on: June 28, 2012, 09:50:37 AM »
Thanks everyone!  Gonna work on it.


We wish you the best of luck.    Hang around here and visit us everyday you can.  We will keep supporting you.  A great way to waste some time (that you don't have) too.   :)

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mjmac

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Re: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #8 on: July 08, 2012, 08:55:34 AM »
Hi Dave - i'm not a SAHD, (however my wife is a SAHM and i have the up most respect and admiration for anyone that is a SAHP.  Not that we are debating 'worth'...but i stumbled across this link regarding the value of SAHM(s)...very interesting http://www.salary.com/stay-at-home-mom-infographic/.  (Something to share if that question ever comes up)  One thing that GREATLY helped both my wife and I handle the time crunch and 'chores' (and don't get me wrong...some things just have to get done.) is lowering our expectations a bit...we were working on such a tight schedule when we had our first child...we thought we kept everything together pretty well...by child #3, we were completely fooling ourselves and other than trying to get up at 4AM or stay up until 1AM...there was no possible way to 'get it all done'.  So we balanced and got really better at identifying those things that "had to be done" and those that could slip a few days (or weeks). And even though i am working full-time...we split the chores...(she cooks and i do dishes...she starts laundry and I fold in the evening while the kids are in bed..etc.)  Long story short...just because i work full-time does not exempt me from sharing in the duties. The realization...it's not 50/50...it's 110/110..requires both mom and dad to stretch themselves. (Last comment - it's a gradual process...i would never approach (or want my wife to approach me with a big bang 'change'...work it in gradually or it will look like you're feeling undervalued and the reality is that you're BOTH stretched.)  Hope that helps some...first time i'm posting in a LONG while due to my Internet time being greatly impeded on. :-)

Offline Keith

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Re: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #9 on: July 08, 2012, 12:42:56 PM »
Great answer there Mark!     :plus1:


My wife stays home too and I work full time, sometimes quite a bit of overtime too.  But I do try my best to help out with as much as I can.  Sometimes it can get frustrating, but it's best that the job gets done. 

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fatt_tony_13

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Re: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #10 on: July 09, 2012, 12:36:57 AM »
I stay at home in our family, the only chores that I ask my wife to do are the dishes and the laundry. Now with there being 5 people in our house that is quite a bit to ask. After 3 years I have finally gotten her to realize that Im not worried about if there are dishes in the sink or clothes in the hampers at the end of the day. 

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Re: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #11 on: July 13, 2012, 10:36:41 PM »
I'm a SAHD to a 3 1/2 year old boy and a 9 month old girl  :LMAO:  our children are so close in age.

I get the visible areas done.  Living room, kitchen and bedroom.  Keep up with it every day and it won't be as bad.  My son goes to school 2 days a week and I think I actually get less done on those days than others cause I am gaming most of it  :righton:

Jackson, my son, is pretty independent, so keeping him busy isn't a huge problem.  I do have to watch and entertain the baby though cause she just started walking.  Nap times are the best time to get your stuff done.  I work nights, so the following days not a WHOLE lot gets done cause I'll usually nap with the kids, but even then, I am able to pick up a little bit.  Jackson is ok at cleaning up his toys as long as I make him, or even offer to help out a little bit.

You don't really need a schedule to get stuff done, but you do need to find the time.  My wife likes things relatively clean when she gets home, but at the same time, when she is home with the kids and I am at work, absolutely nothing gets done  :laugh2: so whatever.  I let it slide. 

GirouxZone

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Re: HELP! In need of toddler schedule! Please help!
« Reply #12 on: July 18, 2012, 02:35:50 PM »
I usually set a general schedule:

Monday: Laundry. All of it. Glorious.
Tuesday: Dusting (hate that!)/Vacuuming.
Wednesday: Bathrooms.
Thursday: Lawn care/Weekly meal planning and grocery shopping.
Friday: Deep clean the kitchen

Each of those only takes a couple hours, so the rest of the time is taken up with the usual picking crap up, and then performing whatever house maintenance/errands/special projects come up.

One thing I highly advise, is to have an absolute priority list that supercedes all other requests. For a while my wife would ask me to do something outside of the usual chores, but sometimes I'd plan it for later in the week or something. Then I'd get the "I asked you to do ONE THING and you didn't!" lecture. So, now all special requests are done immediately, and THEN I go on to the general tasks. Pretty much the same procedure I followed through back in the office world, which was that when the BOSS asks for something, all other stuff got superceded, because ultimately that was where the paycheck was coming from.

 



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